Successful UC Berkeley Admissions Essay: Intro

So, you want to get into one of the top public schools in the United States: UC Berkeley.

Of course, getting in means having strong essays that will beat out the rest of the competition. If you’re looking for a solid UC Berkeley essay that worked, look no further. Here in this article, we will cover a successful application essay to Berkeley. But first, how do you know that our sample essay is better than others?

Well, this essay actually helped our applicant get into Berkeley with lower scores than average. This usually goes for all of our other admissions essays, which you can find here, here, here, and here.

Let’s see how our applicant’s scores were compared to the competition.

              

Successful Berkeley Applicant Scores

• GPA: 3.8
• SAT Evidence-Based Reading and Writing: 660
• SAT Mathematics: 660
• SAT Essay: 17
• AP Courses: None

UC Berkeley Freshman Admission Profile.

You can check out more information on their admission profile through the University of California website. With that said, consider this. Her marks are significantly lower than those of the average applicant’s

As you can see, a good admissions essay makes a huge difference.

In fact, a strong set of UC PIQs can compensate for a low GPA or SAT/ACT scores. There are countless reasons why strong PIQ essays help you stand out from the rest of the competition. And, we’ve covered this more in-depth “here”.

We attribute this article’s essay’s success to two things:

1. Being well-written enough to make up for her lower scores
2. A strong essay topic that demonstrated she was more capable than the average applicant.

UC Berkeley Essays That Worked: Sample Essay

“My local library hosts graphic novel contests annually, and about a year ago, I took second place. It was a memorable experience for me, as the contest provided an opportunity for me to showcase one of my passions: art. I have been interested in art for as long as I can remember. Growing up, I looked at the world through aesthetic lenses, from deciphering the patterns and colors of my mother’s flower garden to sitting in class and transforming my classmates into lines and shades in my notebook. Over the years, coursework and extracurriculars left me with dwindling time to draw, but my passion for it as a hobby wasn’t subdued. Throughout high school, I was far from confident or talkative, but art has opened many opportunities for me to collaborate with others and reach out to people with the same interests. My artistic ability is a quality that I am very proud of and will strive to develop here and in the future.

My curiosity for the arts started at a young age. I remember doodling nonsensical illustrations in my mother’s cookbook and asking her to draw stick figures for me. In 5th grade, my friend lent me a comic book, filled with illustrations that sparked my journey into drawing.  From then on, I spent my days and nights cramming in as many illustrations as I could. Something about creating a work of art from my own hands fascinated me. I found a home in art, not only within myself but with others as well.

I was a meek child, one of those kids people called “quiet” and “shy” in class. However, immersing myself in art helped me to open up and develop social skills, slowly bringing me out of my shell. I started to sell my illustrations as well as do custom requests. This taught me to develop business skills and learn how to talk with others.  I also took my hobby online: I shared my work on online communities, gaining an audience of fellow artist friends who encouraged me to continue to create. The sociality I lacked in school, I gained in the form of friends on the internet. I continued to branch out, eventually doing freelance work in an online manga label with a group of other artists. It was an incredibly rewarding and unique experience for me. Working with others not only gave me a space to express my thoughts and passions; it also taught me to effectively handle deadlines and disagreements. Through this, I learned that not everyone has the same reasoning and ideas, and collaboration and working together is crucial for success. Lastly, art has also taught me balance, as above being an artist, I was a student. Through this hobby, I learned to allocate my time properly between the too.           

I’ve been drawing for almost a decade, but never in my life did I think my passion would  become a catalyst for me to establish qualities important for my future. Art brought others to me, thus allowing me to interact with them and develop the skills I needed to talk to people. Because I desired to share my work and improve my talent, I gained new friends and joined a group where I can showcase my creations and gain an understanding of what it’s like to work with others with the same interests, but varying ideas. I don’t wish to pursue art as a main career. However, it is still just as precious to me. Ultimately for me, I did not only create art, I created skills and qualities in me that prove useful to me way past the realm of lines and colors on paper.”

Example UC Berkeley Essay That Worked –PenningPapers

Here are a few things to consider about our successful UC Berkeley essays that worked.

Note that these variables aren’t always required in every essay. Each essay is different, and unique to everyone’s circumstances. But, these are all variables we noticed had worked for other essays.

1. Declaring a Future Major: Declaring a major can significantly improve your admissions chances. Our applicant mentioned in the first paragraph why they’re passionate about pursuing art. Additionally, they showed how they were competent in their field.
   
   However, you should note that it’s not mandatory to declare your major.
   
   You can still write a solid UCB essay without having to say you know exactly what your major is. After all, most students are not aware of what they want to do with their careers in the future.
   
   Nonetheless, whether you decide to show whether you know your major or not, you should establish certainty. Students who don’t know their major can still show that they’re certain about their future and not wandering in the dark. They would need to mention the steps they’re taking to learn more about what they want to pursue, or the kinds of fields they may show interest in without having to dedicate quite yet.
2. Awards or Victories: Our applicant demonstrated that they were competent in their desired field through their success in awards. Awards show admissions officers the applicant isn’t just competent but also beats the rest of the competition. Any awards you earn are a fantastic way of standing out to top universities.
   
   Now, this is not to say winning awards is mandatory. Victories outside of competitive spheres can also demonstrate your strength. You just need to know how to articulate your growth and positive attributes to admissions officers correctly.
3. Exponential Growth: This application makes very clear the exponential personal growth that the student has made over time. She was talented in art but struggled with socializing. She elaborates on improving her social skills through her art, showing she can overcome obstacles despite imperfections.

One critical point to make is the lack of depth in imagery. This essay isn’t as profoundly deep in imagery and detail as it could be. Additionally, imagery is best placed at the beginning of the essay. This helps admissions officers see your writing prowess and details early on.

Nonetheless, having deeper imagery in the introduction and body paragraphs would have given the admissions essay even more weight.

Have questions about our successful UC Berkeley essays that worked? Or, perhaps you wish to get accepted into Berkeley without stellar extracurriculars, GPA, and SAT/ACT scores. Talk with us to have expert admissions advice and consulting to optimize your chances of getting into your dream school!